Sunday, March 11, 2007

Russia Holding Elections Using The Bush Doctrine

MOSCOW - Russians voted Sunday in scattered regional ballots marred by complaints that opposition forces are being frozen out of the country's politics.

Although two mainstream parties and a smattering of smaller ones are on the ballot for legislatures in 14 of Russia's 86 regions, critics say the appearance of genuine pluralism is only superficial.

Many of the voters who turned out in early morning in St. Petersburg, one of the election regions, expressed dismay that some parties had been barred from the ballot.

The liberal Yabloko party was not allowed on the ballot in Russia's second city because electoral officials ruled that more than 10 percent of the signatures checked by authorities were invalid. The party says its appeals were thwarted even after people whose signatures were ruled invalid testified to their authenticity.

Karl Rove was seen this morning in Moscow, wiping a tear from his eye muttering softly, "They are all grown up now", before a meeting with a Russian "businessman" in an alley behind a bar.

Seriously though, I looked into pootie-poot's eyes, and I saw George W. Bush. They genuinely are soul mates. That is where people are wrong to be dissapointed in Vladimir Putin. He is like Bush, and Bush infatuated himself, was in love. Putin is just more efficient at killing his critics. It's true. We each have something to teach each other. It's part of being in the world family, and the league of nations, and the coalition of those willing to urinate on their citizens. So far it's us and Russia. Let's not forget to invite Poland.