Saturday, March 17, 2007

Charlie Rangel Reviews Dennis Miller's Career

Rangel: 'Dennis Miller is a born loser' "The only positive thing I can say about him is that he never gives up."

"I hope that Nancy Pelosi, the Speaker of the House and third in line for the presidency of the United States would never be tempted to respond to a comedian who has never, but never, made it," Mr. Rangel said, driving the point home.

Oh Snap! Rangel was responding to Dennis Miller's unfunny emcee role at a Rudy "the cousin fucker" Giuliani fundraiser where Miller insulted David Obey and Nancy Pelosi. He also shared further wisdom with the knuckle dragging crowd.
Mr. Giuliani was introduced by comedian Dennis Miller, who used at least one expletive when joking about the lack of trustworthy evidence to back up claims of global warming. In a performance that felt something like an HBO standup special, Mr. Miller also called two Democrats, including the speaker of the House of Representatives, "morons" and "inconsequential people who don't take the threat to our culture seriously."

Rangel did sum it up succinctly. However let me fill in the gaps a bit. Dennis Miller's talk show was such a disaster that Professor Fritz Breuhaus was his set decorator. His idea of supporting Ross Perot was a decision that evoked the wisdom of campers at Crystal Lake who got the multi year discount pass (chainsaws extra). It was also the wisdom to name his kid after a fictional character who would have kicked both his and Dennis' ass and called him a poseur. But we are not done.

Dennis' career continued to it's inexorable conclusion when he thought it was a good idea to interrupt plays on NFL Monday Night Broadcasts by giggling at himself like well Ross Perot after staring at a chart for 19 hours straight, convinced there was proof there of the CIA plot against his daughter's wedding.

But Dennis wasn't finished. Right when people started looking into George W. Bush's soul and realizing there was a "under construction" sign there, that is when Dennis jumped into the ring and said, "lead me master".

For his next act, Dennis Miller will be selling thalidomide door to door. It is a growth industry after all. Sales have just been slumping for a bit.