Friday, December 28, 2007

I Get Mail

Dear Fellow Republican:

As Oregon's only statewide elected Republican, the national Democrats have made me their top target for defeat in 2008, in an effort to expand their slim majority in the U.S. Senate. If you want the Republicans to take back our majority in 2008, I need your immediate help today to fight back against these liberal Democrats!

Dude, you are a relatively centrist Republican. Just because nobody except those who follow politics to an insane level of obsession, it's still not nice to pretend you are a mouth breather just to fool Newt Gingrich's mom into donating to your campaign.

You may have recently read that the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee, lead by ultra-liberal New Yorker, Chuck Schumer, has poured more coordinated money into the Oregon Senate race than any other race in the country this year. There is no doubt that Schumer and the liberal Democrats have done this in an effort to expand their majority in the Senate.

Ultra liberal? Chuck Schumer? Really? They are trying to defeat you in a sneaky bid to win an election. Who writes this shit? I mean really. It's like saying the New England Patriots are planning on throwing the ball in the end zone in a deliberate effort to score points.
But, my campaign will fight back and I need your help now more than ever to do so. Will you help my campaign to keep by making an immediate contribution of $50 or more to fight back?

In just three months, the national Democrats spent $93,000 in support of Oregon House Speaker, Jeff Merkley's campaign to defeat me. And this is just the tip of the iceberg.... As the national Democrats' top target in 2008, I know that these far-left liberals will pour millions more into this race to defeat me and expand their Senate majority.

$93,000 whole dollars were thrown against Smith so far. It's just the beginning. Pretty soon, they will use this money to run ads in a nefarious effort to win. Gordon Smith needs our help now!

My campaign is coming up on an important fundraising deadline. Monday, December 31st marks the end of the fourth quarter and we will be filing a fundraising report that the media and the liberals will scrutinize. I need your help right away to raise as much money as possible in the next few days to show the strength of our campaign organization. Please follow this link immediately to make your contribution of $25, $50, $100, $250, $500 or more before Monday, December 31st.

Those bastards! What won't they stoop to in their Jihad against Gordon Smith?